Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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