I need help removing her.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Randomize
