She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
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