i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
