3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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