He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
