haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
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I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
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We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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