"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize