question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
