I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
