It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I could make wine with my vomit
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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