: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
