I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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