mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You ruined the universe
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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