Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
