a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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