I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
