my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
