i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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