He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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