yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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