All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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