I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
