I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm like, not good at living.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
