You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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