Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize