just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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