Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
