So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
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You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize