areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
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