I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
