Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize