if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize