Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
