I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No subtext here. People are naked.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Randomize