There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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