forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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