Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
