I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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