I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
So vagazzling was a success
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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