Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
