this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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