I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
