Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
