he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Someone signed my nipple.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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