I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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