I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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