We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
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He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
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You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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