How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
and i looked up. we had an audience...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize