My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Barsexuality is the new black.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
