apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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