I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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